Baby Got Front

14 Jul

From The Sun UK

So, as you can see from this picture, Sheyla Hershey has a great personality.  A really, really great one.  On a scale from 1 – 10, I’d give it a 38KKK.

Oh.  She also has the world’s largest breasts, and recently got sick because of it or something.

Claire didn’t really care about that.  “Damn,” she said.   “I don’t think I have enough chest skin to stretch over something like that.”

Unlike most of the things Claire says, that’s actually a valid point.

PAGING DR. MD! 

For those of you who don’t know, “Dr. MD” is our friend and go-to medical correspondent when WebMD is unavailable.

Hi.  How does the chest skin stretch out to hold a gallon of silicone?

Well…skin stretches and they actually put bags in there that have injectable ports, so they inject like 20 cc’s at a time. (Editor’s note:  He is referring to a unit of measurement and not a boob size.  I had to google this.)

So…how many trips is that?  Like say it was me.  How many times would I have to go?

Well, YOU a whole lot more than most…

DR. MD!

*Laughing*
For, an average woman…that’s a different question.  I’m really not sure.  Minimum 2 -3,  but it could go up to 10.  You know, I have my own questions about this story.  First, ‘KKK’ is really the bra size she decided on?  Also, she’s Brazilian…

No, I don’t think she’s Brazilian.  It just says that’s where she gets her boobs done because the laws are looser there…

HA! That’s kinda hilarious.  I’d like to phone a friend and make sure Drew finds that as hilarious as I do that, that boob laws are looser in Brazil.

Can we stick to the POINT, PLEASE?!

Sorry.  I’m a guy.

So, where are these “ports.”

Near the armpit.

Are they real holes.  That you can pour anything into?  Like Kool-Aid?

You’re weird.  I think so.  I’m actually guessing on a lot of this though.

But I thought you were a doctor?

Yeah…I practice Emergency Medicine.

Well this is an emergency!!

Sigh.  Okay, remember the Nike Airs where you pressed the button and inflated them with air.  It’s like that…but with a needle.  And boobs, not shoes.  But basically the same concept.  I actually think that once you inflate the skin, they switch it out with silicone.

*Here the call is dropped. I call him back*  Hello?

Ha.  I just got your picture.   That’s not really attractive.

Wait, you thought she was gonna be hot?

Well…She has the biggest breasts ever.  You kinda get excited about it.

My last question is about the size of her nipples.

Crap, I just missed my turn.

Ugh.

You mean does she still have her normal nipples?  Yeah that’s a good question.  I think she would need surgery to get bigger ones…that would be weird…There are a lot of images going through my head right now.  None of them would help you though.

Goodbye Doctor.

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9 Responses to “Baby Got Front”

  1. Claire July 14, 2010 at 7:06 pm #

    Dear Dr. MD,

    So okay, so you stretch out the skin in order to fit the fake boobs in there. But what happens if, God forbid, you one day change your mind and need/want them out? How does the skin go back to normal? Or do you have to walk around with deflated skin boobs hanging off your chest for the rest of your life?

    – Claire

    PS, hope you’re enjoying living in (redacted)!

  2. mazz July 15, 2010 at 2:01 am #

    Dear Dr. MD,

    What about stretch marks? She’s gonna have wicked stretch marks.

    Sincerely,
    Mazz

  3. mazall July 15, 2010 at 2:07 am #

    MAZ HAS A NEW PIC!

  4. mazall July 15, 2010 at 2:07 am #

    fail

  5. mazall July 15, 2010 at 2:10 am #

    test

  6. Marc July 15, 2010 at 2:50 am #

    This whole post kind of makes me want to throw up.

  7. menelaos July 15, 2010 at 3:24 am #

    Ok ok ok… first I need to point out that I *prefaced* this whole phone interview with the “this doesn’t fall under my job description” comment and that every answer was also preceded with “If I had to guess…”

    Now that I got that out of the way:

    Mazall: I bet this is surgeon-dependant

    Claire: First of all, they make you pay out the rest of your lease if you try to turn those things in early. In case of an emergency though, I’m certain you could donate the loose skin to science…

  8. Drewpreme July 16, 2010 at 6:19 pm #

    Besides her the offense I take to her KKKup size, I wouldn’t mind taking a spin with those funbags for a while. I mean its the same reason why people want to climb me while I’m out at bars. Looks like a fun thing to do.

    • Marc July 17, 2010 at 12:18 am #

      At the worst, it would be a nice story to tell!

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