18 Aug

claireIn celebration of Claire’s 27th birthday, here are 27 things we “love” about Claire.


Reporting contributed by Alyssa and Mazall.

  1. Her mom.
  2. The fact that she would like to have a destructive, emotionally stunted relationship with Don Draper from Mad Men…
  3. …But she also secretly loves America’s Next Top Model.
  4. Her affinity for things named “Molly.”
  5. Her dog’s affinity for licking dirty underwear.
  6. She’s a WASP and she knows/likes it.
  7. Her tireless coverage of important things like Facebook and Twitter.
  8. Those amazing, almost otherworldly, tan lines.
  9. How she’s not afraid to constantly and consistently hate on Anne Hathaway.
  10. She’ll never say no to wine or cereal.
  11. She wants to be Jewish for the food.
  12. Even in the presence of celebs like John Krasinski and Lou Reed, she keeps her cool and maintains her journalistic integrity.
  13. Sometimes her roommates don’t wear pants.
  14. She’s a Jenga Master.  Evan is not.
  15. None of Molly’s other friends find Alyssa’s status messages quite as funny.
  16. It takes her three months to load pictures onto Facebook, unless you gash your face opening HER bottle of wine, in which case an album showcasing your injury is instantly created.
  17. She reads books really, really fast.
  19. Her iPod is stuck in the nineties.  But the good nineties.
  20. She is much more amusing than an Avett Brothers concert.
  21. Dave & Buster Claim To Fame:  Her uncle is Buster!
  22. She’s really good at cutting and pasting blogging.
  23. Because she’s from Chicago, she uses long A’s, and Mazall thinks it’s cute.
  24. Yes, she is quietly judging you.
  25. I never asked, but I’m pretty sure she knows there’s no halftime in baseball.
  26. She probably feels “awkward” by now.
  27. It’s cute how she thinks that lists qualify as blog entries.

10 Responses to “HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLAIRE!”

  1. Claire August 18, 2009 at 8:07 pm #

    3. There is nothing secret about my America’s Next Top Model love. I adore it openly – nay, FIERCELY

    9. F- Anne Hathaway

    11. This one is completely false. If I were Jewish, I wouldn’t have SANTA! (Also Jesus.)

    24. I have a good story about this from last weekend.

    • Marc August 18, 2009 at 9:41 pm #


      • Molly August 18, 2009 at 9:45 pm #


      • Claire August 19, 2009 at 3:19 am #

        She’s ugly and she doesn’t love you, Marc

      • Marc August 19, 2009 at 3:34 am #

        Oh you’ve talked to her? Can you set us up? kthx

  2. Marc August 18, 2009 at 9:41 pm #

    Additions, addendums, etc, et al

    -When I once described a future Claire as Lucille Bluth she said it was the nicest compliment she’d ever been given
    -Claire is classy, but grounded enough to appreciate a good box of wine and/or poop joke
    -I can show off pieces she has written and people are impressed that I know someone who’s not a total failure.
    -She can still be entertained by a children’s science museum, despite not actually being a child.

    • Claire August 18, 2009 at 10:09 pm #

      Yes, but I have the mental capacity of a child.

  3. mazall August 20, 2009 at 1:43 pm #

    also, claire, i would have an emotionally stunted relationship with don draper as well. he’s hot.

  4. Drewpreme August 21, 2009 at 6:24 pm #

    Is your uncle seriously the “Buster” of Dave & Busters? When they opened one of the original spots in Philly I loved that place. Now they’ve gone all TGI Friday-fied.

    PS – I saw Cheryl Hines on Conan last night. Get used to it Claire – you have a hot celebrity doppleganger.


  5. Drewpreme August 21, 2009 at 6:25 pm #

    Drewpreme is responsible for the 1000th comment on this blog. Where’s my effin’ prize ladies?

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