This Week in Janice

14 Jul

I haven’t done one of these in a while, which means I have a LOT of good Janice emails that have been sitting in my inbox waiting to be enjoyed by the masses. Enjoy:

LOVE, MOM

LOVE, MOM

Subj: email etiquette ?
Hi Kiddo- I have a ? I have wanted to ask for ages. My “address book” had people in it by their real names, ’cause I entered them without thinking,but when I cruise the net, there are always people responding to articles and stuff with names like”CatWoman99″-which is a lot more private. I see your pals have their real 1st and last names on their emails responses. Are we all past this fake internet/email name stuff from the 1990’s? Why the “catwoman99@…” if “MarySmith”is in front of it? Is there a way not to be “MarySmith”? Should I retype my address book? Confused by technology. Take care, Love, MOM

Subj: Shaq Report
On radio-Shaq has been traded from something to something. Go see if he twittered about it or went Mum!!??!! Didn’t you have a “Shaqophile” pal or 2?
Also, July, 2009 issue of Town & Country has article about Munich, Germany- big picture of “Pale People” sunbathing on Munich’s Isar river’s pebbly riverbank. Tell the German.
Bookcase installers busy in basement as I type! Yeah!!
Rain is coming your way tomorrow I think.
“All the news that is fit to print!” from L. F. Take care, Love, MOM

Subj: Go Buy:tanned legs (TCLMom)
Morning kiddo—-I highly reccommend “L’oreal Sublime Glow “–tube –in “MEDIUM skin tones”daily moisturizer. (Use after shower)Used it several days ago just 1nce and it works.No orange!!  Just put it on for 2nd time. knees down to top of feet only. And feet do not have a line . And did nt ruin dark brown slacks that I spilt it on. Course they were dark already. And they got laundered. Still.YOU LOVE MOISTURIZER ANYWAY. GIVE IT A TRY. Retain HiltonHead.Take care, Love, MOM
(Note: She called me two days later to tell me that she had used it a few more times and that it DID in fact turn her orange and her previous recommendation had been rescinded)
Subj: Have to tell U
The Pres of Homeowner’s Assoc. here gets email updates from LF cops- I LUV LF!!!—all the time–
latest is RE: Michael Jackson spam/viruses. How you ask? Sweet innocent folks going online to look up MJ’s recent demise are infected by VIRUSES.
He then sends these Cop warnings on to us, His People in the Assoc.
Did I say, I LOVE LF!!! Take care, Love, MOM


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3 Responses to “This Week in Janice”

  1. Cara July 14, 2009 at 4:41 am #

    “1nce”? Really, Janice? She’s clearly hipper than me.

  2. Claire July 14, 2009 at 2:27 pm #

    also “i have a ?”

  3. Molly July 14, 2009 at 3:02 pm #

    “On radio-Shaq has been traded from something to something.”

    I now see where you get your flair for journalism.

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