Alyssa: Anything BUT Status Quo

Alyssa's new status message: NOT SINGLE TONIGHT!

Status messages on Gmail or Facebook (wait, shouldn’t Claire be writing this?) reveal a lot about a person.  Everyone has their own style, their own unique way of telling the world what’s up.  Claire’s typically have to do with me (UGH MOLLY!) or journalism (reading about pampered pets for a Q&A tomorrow. Question one: WTF? Question two: Stop it).   Drew’s are either rap lyrics or hilarious (Drew…is gonna go shirtless with a cold one in the driveway. You think property values are down now? Just you wait).  Mazall’s are foreign and minimalistic (le sigh), while Mene’s and Evan’s just never change.  Ever.

But no one compares to Alyssa.  Those lucky enough to see her name at the left side of their Gmail screen are given SERIOUS access to Alyssa’s brain, for good or for bad, because nothing is off-limits.  A random sampling of Alyssa’s topical range….

Why does my roommate want babies? I dunno. Let’s ask her.

"Mazall" with her roost

So, in a freak occurrence, I was wrong and Mazall was right. Absolutely Fabulous is quite good. Once you get past the obnoxious laugh track and Patsy’s teeth, that is. Admitting I was wrong is typically very troubling for me, except that there are just so many other things to make fun of Mazall for. The “books” she reads, the “food” she eats, the “guys” she dates. Also, she wants babies. Lots of them. She’s not Mormon.

So why?

I’m too tired to come up with a headline

Wow, so apparently Molly has a lot more free time than I do. How did she figure out how to add pictures? I have no idea how to do that. I bet Evan could tell me, he knows everything. Evan! How do you add pictures? Hey, Evan! Evan evan evan. EVAN Evaaaannnnnnn.
I think he’s ignoring me.
I can’t write a real entry because it’s 11 pm and I still have to read the second half of a book about (redacted) so I can interview (redacted) in the morning about why in the world anyone would want to (redacted).
Instead, I will leave you with some thoughts that have made their way through my incredibly vapid, blond mind within the past few days.